Devastation

I just...I can't even believe it. At this point I'm amazed we even trusted slendy. I remember Taben was extremely uneasy about slendy hanging around his son in the past. I remember thinking he worried too much because slendy clearly treated Allen the same way he treats Sandra. I thought that meant we could trust him not to hurt Allen. He gave us his word he would never hurt Allen and then he went on and on about how he never breaks his word.

I think...Allen was just another victim waiting to happen all that time. I don't think he was ever "special" like the rest of us thought. I think slendy has to make the children he takes trust him completely before he can lead them to wherever it is they go. I think he was just biding his time and waiting for the right moment. He didn't want us to turn on him in the past, which he knew we would if Allen disappeared. He was holding out because he wanted to remain close to Aiden to monitor him and to Chastin and I once we showed up here.

Now, however, he has no reason to have us on his side. Relations between slendy and our group were getting uneasy anyway. He probably has other plans for us now. Even if Taben goes back to working for It, slendy can still use this to his advantage. 

My friends are losing everything...Aiden lost his family and Taben lost his husband and son. I wish I could do more to stop these deaths...All I can really do is help Aiden protect Brennon and Chastin now.

Chastin, I swear I won't let anything happen to you. Aiden, I promise I'll do whatever it takes to help you protect Brennon and get through all of this. Taben...you need to remember who your real friends are.

Aiden and I are going to stay up every night from now on and watch over the house to make sure nothing bad happens. I still don't know if I can go for as long as Ai can without sleep, but we'll see. It's been three days without rest so far and I'm still feeling fine. I guess we'll have to see.

Things aren't going very well

First of all, Taben, you will not be killing Brennon or Chastin any time soon because we're here to protect them.

However, I've been thinking about what happened the other day, how I had fallen asleep even though I had resolved to stay up and keep slendy out of our room. Taben mentioned that I'm not taking the time to learn about my new powers and, well, he's right. Lately so many things have been happening that I haven't had time to focus on understanding them fully. I know I need to train myself. Now is a great time to start, especially since Allen is safe here with us and we don't have to worry about facing too much mayhem at the moment.

I'm finally able to go without sleep. I could do it those nights we were looking for Allen because I was moving around and I was focused on something. I didn't feel tired when I had a reason to be out and about. Sitting in a chair staring at Chastin while he slept, however, didn't do much to inspire me to find that inner reserve of energy that takes days to run out.

I haven't slept since Wednesday. I recently got a new game, Catherine, and I decided to train myself to stay up by using that to occupy me. It worked. I'm not tired in the least right now and I was able to keep slendy out of our room like I had planned.

I don't really know what else I can do to master my powers. I guess I could like...meditate...or something. When Aiden's feeling better I'll ask him to help me.

Finally, I've noticed that slendy's been acting very oddly recently. When he isn't attempting to freak Chastin out, he's constantly with Allen. I see him standing in Allen's room at night after I chase him out of ours. I don't remember him doing that in the past. I guess he could just be trying to make sure that It doesn't try to hurt Allen again, but I don't know. For some reason it...worries me. He's here a lot more than usual. It used to be that he'd be here for a couple days of the week and gone the others unless we called him, but now, if he does leave, it's only for a few hours a day and then he goes right back to dividing his time between watching over Allen and being creepy to Chastin (no doubt he has to make time to torment other Runners). I don't know why it bothers me...I just can't shake this ominous feeling I have.

I'm sure we'll be greeted with some kind of hell storm of terrible things soon...that seems to happen a lot.

P.S. Has anyone else been watching the videos being made by Derek, Reach's (or Ray if you want to call him that) cousin? If so, am I the only one that's seeing slendy in them? I swear I saw him in the most recent one but I could be wrong. I hope I'm wrong for Derek's sake, at least.

If you don't stop staring at me I'm going to punch your nonexistent face in

I'm sitting here watching Allen play video games while Aiden and Brennon are out. Chas is in the kitchen making us food because he's a woman (lol sexist fail).

Anyway, as I said to start off this post, if you don't stop staring at me, slendy, I'm going to knock you on the ground with a hole where your "face" should be. I showed that to him and he just did that infuriating head tilt.

He's here to help me keep an eye on Allen, but he's making it really hard for me. Chastin feels extremely uncomfortable being in the same room as him and makes a lot of effort to find things to do that keep him away.

I don't mind. I completely understand his fear. I'm safe because I'm already a proxy and a Revenant on top of that. He can't do anything to hurt me. Chastin, however, is still a normal human and, now that the truce Taben had established with slendy to save us is broken, Chastin is completely at his mercy.  I know slendy won't try anything while I'm around, but I'm still wary of him. Slendy isn't laying a finger or tentacle on Chastin and, if he tries, I will rip his head off.

That doesn't change the fact that he still tries his hardest to frighten Chastin. At night he stands in the corner of our room and stares at Chas. I don't think anything of it because I'm so used to his presence, but Chas can hardly sleep. Chas woke up screaming last night because of a horrific nightmare I know slendy caused and woke up again an hour or so later because he felt a cold hand on his shoulder and was treated to slendy staring down at him with his tentacles out in force.

The hallway outside of our room is fairly creepy at night and slendy takes advantage of that. Whenever Chas goes upstairs or gets out of bed slendy always makes sure he's standing at the end of the hallway. Apparantly he does this thing where he slowly gets closer and closer to Chastin every time he looks back at slendy.

I tried telling Chas not to worry. With my hypersensitivity I'll wake up instantly if he screams, so slendy can't do much to hurt him. Despite this, however, Chastin is still deathly afraid of him. I've decided that, tonight, I'm going to stay up all night keeping an eye on Chastin and keeping slendy out of the room. I also don't know how long Ai will be gone, so I'll need to stay up and watch Allen too if he isn't back.

Back to the present, slendy's staring at me still and it's driving me crazy. I guess he's mad that I'm the one that got away from him and that as long as I'm around he can't have Chastin, the one he wanted originally.

Actually...it's almost like he wants me to leave. That's weird. Well, he can just go die because I'm not moving. Yeah, I know you can hear my thoughts you skinny freak. I'm making sure you can hear them. I don't trust you and I'm not leaving you alone with the kid. Go die.

I hope he gets mad, then I have an excuse to hit him.

Letting you guys know

Hey all. We're inside the Path of Black Leaves right now. I hate this place, but it's quite the confidence booster knowing the creatures here can't hurt us. I can still feel horrible monsters in the distance...probably more Bleeding Trees or creatures similar. I feel It in the castle.

We can't actually go straight to the castle. We just kind of have to walk around until it comes to us, which it will. It's getting closer all the time. 

Oh, and I punched one of those clawed creatures that hang around the path. I think It might be trying to get them to come for us, because one of them made this horrible gurgling screeching noise and swiped at me. It was pretty awesome. It went flying and all the others backed off. This pretty much sums up my feelings:

Yeah, ME GUSTA. I must also thank my phone for being awesome enough to let me post here.

We don't really have a lot to do right now, as you can see. Things will get more intense soon, I can assure you.

Edit:

Ok, this is considerably more serious than what I'd been talking about before. Taben made an...interesting comment on his own post in response to something I said.

Firstly, he said he's a Revenant, too. This must be a bluff. His evidence was that he can use the Path now, but you don't need to be a Revenant to do that, just a proxy.

Secondly and most important, Chastin, he made a threat on yours and Brennon's lives. Be on the look out, please...we'll be back as soon as we possibly can.

Actually, with this kind of danger potentially coming your way we're considering having me come out to protect you. I don't want to leave Ai to fend for himself here, but neither of us want you guys to get hurt either.

Of course, there's the problem that Taben might have said that to get us to leave the Path. There's no way we can know if he was bluffing. All we can really do now is hurry.

Please be okay, guys...if things do get bad, try calling for slendy. If we've learned anything about him, it's that he doesn't want anyone other than him to kill those he's marked as prey. Well, Chas, you're his prey still so maybe he'll come and stop Taben.

We're almost to the castle.

Checking In

We spent most of last night searching the surrounding woods and in other places for Allen. We couldn't think of anywhere else he could be. It was strange being able to go that long without rest...I'm not even tired now. We took a break to tell Chas and Brennon that we hadn't found anything and because I needed to eat (that apparently hasn't changed despite my new powers). I guess I know a little of how you feel, Ai.

Wait...I had a thought. What if It took Allen into the Path of Black Leaves? I'm fairly certain that It and slendy could keep a normal human alive there using their powers. At least, I would hope that's the explanation. I'd rather not let my mind stray into the "Allen could be an It proxy" area for now. Ai, I know it's a long shot but I feel like we should check there too. If you want, you can just send me and you can keep looking out here. The most likely place there is the castle and I'm pretty sure I can handle anything there now (besides It, of course).

Also, regarding Andromeda, a part of me wants to beat the shit out of her for what she did to KK. I know that it's more prudent to leave it be for now and focus on saving Taben, though. I'm sorry, Ai. If she comes here I promise I'll try and be civil for as long as I can. Hell, maybe we'll get lucky and slendy will command her to help us or something (doubtful, but still).

 Anyway, I guess I'd better go back out for now. I don't know where else we can look, though. I guess we could like...try and interrogate It if we have to. We're both pretty badass now, after all. I can feel It somewhere to the left of me. I'll have to see what Aiden makes of that.

It feels weird

Hey guys. So...I'm a Revenant now. It feels, as I stated in this post's title, weird. I can sense everything in my surroundings and I have super strength and healing abilities just like I should. The only downside is, of course, the hypersensitivity. You know, all the typical stuff Reach first told us about the Revenants' abilities. I knew you'd be able to do it, Ai!

I had to test all this out, of course.

Test 1: being able to sense stuff
 I had to have Aiden leave my general vicinity for this one. Once I was aware I was a proxy I could sense his presence anyway. With my new awesomeness, I went outside and could sense all the bugs around me, I could feel Chastin inside with Ai, and I could feel all of our cats upstairs. It feels kind of how it did being inside the Path of Black Leaves. It's pretty cool. It'll definitely come in handy whenever any "undesirables" (as I will call pretty much any of the paranormal entities that inhabit this world and their servants to keep things short) are around. I also noticed that It was watching me from the woods during this test.


Test 2: Super strength and speed
 God, this makes me sound like some super hero. No, it isn't to that extent. I can't like...pick up buildings or run around the house three times in only 10 seconds or anything outlandish like that. The one thing I noticed immediately is that my reflexes have been enhanced a ton. I had Chastin throwing stuff at me as hard as he could and I was able to avoid or catch all of it. I didn't actually get to try out the super strength thing. I was too afraid to. I remembered Andromeda's most recent post. She had been able to disembowel KK's sister with her bare hands. I noticed this same thing today and it scared me. I was holding Chastin's hand and some small part of me knew that I could rip his arm off with a little effort. I need to be extremely careful from now on and train myself to understand how strong I am so I don't hurt anyone.

Test 3: Enhanced healing abilities and hypersensitivity
These two got to go together because I figured them out simultaneously. I had Chastin cut my arm and it healed within a matter of seconds. It hurt like hell though, more than it would normally (I've had a knife buried in my leg before, if you'll recall, and just having my arm cut the way I am now hurt ten times more than that did). This is greatest weakness of a Revenant. Hypersensitivity pretty much means that life is out to get you.

Seriously. Loud noises make me double over in pain, little cuts hurt way more than they should, strong smells give me headaches, and I got a rash on my arms from just existing. It's horrible. I mean, it's good for all the Runners out there since they can use the hypersensitivity against Revenants to save themselves, but it's not fun when you are a Revenant. Reach didn't seem to have this many problems from what I gathered, so hopefully I'll become less sensitive as time passes.

Naomi, it'd be cool if you could still send us the blood from the other Revenant. I don't know if mine will work the way it should since I wasn't created by slendy himself. You know, just as a precaution. We're in Ohio.

Now, I've been thinking and I'm pretty sure the addition of the Revenant's blood to a proxy causes the proxy's body to reject it immediately. It's similar to how the body would react if the blood entering it were the wrong blood type or the way it sometimes treats transplanted organs. The Revenant's blood must make the body's immune system freak out and fight back. The slender substance that is put into proxies to make them such must be similar to an immunosuppressant. In other words, the proxy's immune system is basically shut down to keep it from trying to fight off the foreign substance. The Revenant blood, however, somehow keeps the slender substance from shutting down the immune system and allows it to fight back.

If I recall correctly, there's a lot of vomiting involved while the slender substance is being forced out of the body and the person will be sick for a few days after the injection of the blood. 

Now all that's left is to find Taben. I cannot wait to try my new powers out on some It proxies.

I've figured out something.

Mainly the reason why I'd been so absent...

I'd been down in Montana where my other Uncle lives. He had a lot of answers that I didn't think were even available.

A lot of things began to make sense...

Apparently Slender Man is real... Yeah, okay my bad, but it's hard to believe that something tall, and deathly is real...

According to my Uncle, my father killed himself in a car crash, taking the car off a large cliff by the Pacific shore or something, without saying good bye. Mostly because he didn't want us to ask questions.

Questions mostly about his sanity, and actions... Slender Man has been a part of the family for a while... Just not on good terms. He saw my brother and I at a young age, and my father noticed, my mother denied anything about such a creature, like myself. He had no one to turn to, or be pronounced crazy.

It makes sense to why I have random gaps of memory when I was younger, and why sometimes my brother would just stare into space for no reason, and be unresponsive for hours. Slender Man was speaking to him or something, that caught his attention deeply.

Seems Slendy had a stronger grip on Kyle than he ever did me. It shows why my father was so much more protective of Kyle, rather than me.

Also my father's parenting. He became very mad, depressed, and angry. Usually drunk, crying, sick, abusive. It started to get worse and worse but I didn't notice how bad it was, mostly since I was 5 and didn't know how a family was supposed to work. All along it seemed natural.

Slender Man left us alone for a couple of years after my dad left us.

But he came back soon after my brother graduated, or even before. I went through a couple of albums my uncle had of my brother and I when he used to live closer to us. My brother's emotions would change dramatically in some pictures.

Some would show him enjoying the pool, impressing my Uncle's neighbor's daughter, while in others he's not even in the water. But merely staring into it, like there was a black whole at the bottom.

Pictures of his Prom showed him just sitting at tables, his date off with someone else. Not like the party animal nickname he got in high school.

My uncle said he had thought long and hard about Kyle's suicide. He thinks Slender Man got to him when he went out on his own. Giving reasons why he cut ties with the family. He was trying to save us...

He says I didn't kill Kyle. And that I shouldn't think I could have saved him, because he wouldn't let anyone near him...

Let's Make This Clear

I know everyone thinks me becoming a Revenant is a bad idea, but those saying I shouldn't don't seem to understand...I'm already a proxy. Becoming a badass proxy will not change my situation.

Aiden is a hatchling, a human with slendy's powers (or something along those lines). Slendy will not be turning me into anything and I'm not his proxy, I'm Aiden's. I know it seems weird but this is how it is and it's why I'm so confident that my plan will work.

KK, Naomi, you'll have to forgive me if I didn't fully explain things. I don't actually know if the reason you guys don't want me to do it is because you think I'm still a human or if it's because you think I shouldn't go in any deeper than I already am.

Naomi, if Aiden is unable to give me the powers of a Revenant then it would be awesome if we could get some blood from your friend. Thanks so much for your help.

KK, if you're not ok I'm going to be severely angry with you. I wish I could've done something to help you and I'll do anything I can to help in the future. 

Maybe this explanation was unnecessary...I'm sorry if that's the case. I just don't know what else we can do regarding Taben and I don't want people to worry about me. 

Also, no, I have not told Chas yet. I don't think he knows about what Aiden is and what he can do and I'd rather ease him into this whole thing slowly. He's still taking in the fact that slendy's real, after all. I don't think he really looks at this blog anymore, otherwise he'd definitely know by now.

Finally, I'd just like to say that slendy can be a whiny little bitch sometimes and it's both funny and annoying at the same time. Seriously, he acted like it was our fault that Taben was abducted by It today. Ai, you should just tentacle slap him one of these days. That would be awesome. 

Waiting

I'm sitting with Taben and Ai right now. Aiden's keeping Taben asleep for the time being, just like slendy did to Chas. It's the only way to keep him sane for now.

I recall slendy himself mentioning that, if people keep him out of their thoughts for long enough and run away from where they live, then he won't be able to find them and they can become normal even if they're proxies. It's sort of like what Alex from Marble Hornets does. He moves away and forgets all about his encounters with slendy and is able to escape him for a short while.

This is, of course, out of the question with Taben. We can't just ship him off to some distant place and hope everything goes back to normal with him. Aiden said he has plans, but he hasn't shared them with me yet. I'm sure he will when the time comes.

Chas is in our room right now. He's still so confused about everything that's happening. I don't blame him. It must be so shocking to discover that all his nightmares are real. He still doesn't fully know what happened with Kyle and we aren't really in a position to learn more now that slendy is nowhere to be found.

All we can do is wait, I guess. My plan to use Revenant blood isn't going to work, I'm assuming. I don't really know what's going to happen now.

Oh, I can see It outside the window. I think It wants to know what's going on with us. It wants to know why slendy isn't here and It wants to know what's wrong with Taben. The last thing we need is It sticking its nonexistent nose into this mess, too. 

Revelation

I spoke with KK Collins, the new girl at White Elephants, today. It was cool to chat with her and I wish her lots of luck as she prepares to rescue her sister.

She revealed something to me about Ava's use of a mysterious liquid to remove the slender substance from a proxy's body and make them normal again that I missed. Well, Ava's liquid was Reach's blood. The blood of a Revenant. So this is lovely. We know what we can use but we have no Taben and no source of blood.

Ai, I think it's time we did what I suggested a few posts ago. I'm sure you recall my discussion with slendy on the making of Revenants and how he can use any proxy to channel the power of the Other Side. Well, I'm fairly certain, Ai, that you could do that to me. It might not last long since you don't have a huge amount of control over your powers, but if we can do it long enough to take some of my blood maybe we can use it to save Taben. I remember Ygg saying he couldn't make Revenants at all, but all you have to do is use me as a conduit for your power for a few minutes and the conditions will be right.

The other option is to goad It into sending a Revenant of Its own creation at us and try to subdue him or her long enough to take blood. That, however, sounds more dangerous than it's worth.

So yeah, now we know. It's definitely worth a shot and thanks so much to KK for suggesting it (wow...KK, your name reminds me of KK Slider from Animal Crossing...I am a nerd).

Now the only problem is finding Taben...

Yeah, wish us luck on that.

Edit:

I just finished looking over Ava, Jeff and Cheska, and Chester and Vivi's blogs. They all confirm what KK told me. This should be interesting.

Quite A Scare

As a rabid Harry Potter fan (something Chas has never been able to fully appreciate about me), I pretty much cried during the last Harry Potter movie when we saw it yesterday. Yes, I know this is a very unmanly thing to do, but I don't care because I'm a super nerd. Watching that movie made my whole life complete. Now I must go and read all the books again, which I've been doing for most of today.

Slender Man, of course, managed to rain on my parade yesterday, also. Geocaching is certainly fun. It's like a treasure hunt, something I've always loved doing even if the treasure was cookies or something. We were near the woods the whole time, so Aiden and I were pretty much high strung and on edge for the entirety or our adventure. As Taben said, we were with some of their friends and we didn't want any trouble while they were around.

Sure enough, slendderp appears. Taben let out this squeal of glee when he saw him and our friends also looked to see what he was excited about. I remember Aiden and I exchanging worried glances and I remember hoping that they wouldn't be able to see him. I thought, why would they be able to? They're just bystanders. Slendy's here because Ai, Taben, and I are here, not because he randomly decided to stalk our friends.

Well, of course, one of our friends says, "Whoa,  nice Slender Man costume! (He turns to us.) Is this a prank, guys?"

Aiden and I were frozen in place, both unsure of what to say. We were both in shock and disbelief that slendy would allow them to see him and frightened that slendy would come after them now. Taben, however, was in some state of permanent joy at that point. He had a huge smile on his face and started telling slendy to come over and meet our friends. Slendy tilted his head and I could feel his curiosity and excitement (he's quite the attention whore).

He didn't come over, thankfully. When Taben announced we were going to him, Ai and I both glared at him furiously and Ai suggested that we leave since it was getting dark. Taben got angry. He said that slendy only wanted to play with us. He said that we were bad people for trying to keep our friends from him. This is where things got bad. Slendy clearly wanted to mess with our friends and so the tentacles came out in full force. He disappeared from across the creek and reappeared behind us. Our friends turned tail and ran at this point, realizing it wasn't just a dude in a costume that we were pranking them with.

Taben seemed dazed after slendy finally left. He looked lost and unsure of what to do. Then, something black and slimy oozed down his cheek from his eye. Slender substance, of course. The only time I've ever heard of it leaking out of a proxy is when they're Hallowed. It means it's rotting their insides and turning them into monsters.

I wonder if I've got it in me, too? Slendy makes proxies by pouring himself into people. That definitely isn't how Ai turned me. We don't even know how or when it happened. I know Ai would never make me a Hallowed, but there's no guarantee slendy won't do that to Taben. It might even be happening already...

Ai, we have to act quickly. I know Taben's trade with slendy saved us from him, but mine and Chas' lives aren't worth Taben losing himself.

Taben...I know you keep telling me to trust you, but you aren't seeing what Ai and I are. You have to fight him, Taben. Think about it, if you become his Hallowed you won't be able to protect Allen anymore. There won't be a Taben anymore, just another pawn. Please...I don't want to lose my friend.

Whoa nelly

Anyone other than me see what happened to slendy over at White Elephants? Him turning into a mass of tentacles and other crazy things when hit with 2.5 to 3 million amps of electricity is both awesome and frightening. He came here after that little episode. He looked shaken and he was just barely managing to keep his tentacles from going crazy again.

He actually fell over in the kitchen and was on the floor almost...panting. It was extremely strange seeing him so weak. Taben could feel it too, I guess. He ran into the room wild-eyed and demanding to know what happened. I was all for just leaving slendy on the floor but Taben insisted we help him into one of the chairs.

God...slendy was so...human. The Slender Man, a terrifying abomination and affront to all natural life on this planet who plays with humans before murdering them brutally like a cat does with a mouse, had to have us help him into a chair and was then doubled over and shaking.

He could just barely keep his physical form intact. Parts of him were flickering almost like a candle flame does. Other parts of him, like his tie for example, where squirming violently. His head would randomly twitch and shake in a fashion very akin to what Valtiel from Silent Hill does. It certainly freaked me out.

This is where the shit hit the fan. It appeared outside the window and was almost...mocking slendy. I couldn't hear what It was saying (and I never want to), but slendy clearly could. He went apeshit and so did Taben. I had to hold him back while slendy struggled to get up.

Me (to slendy): "You idiot, don't go out and fight it! The way you are now he'll rip you to shreds."

He looked at me for a moment, tilted his head, and then, out of nowhere, someone whom I can only assume was a proxy appeared. He kneeled before slendy and without a second thought slendy picked him up by the neck. Slendy turned so he was facing away from us and we were treated to a very loud crunching sound accompanied by the proxy's cries of pain, followed by an ominous silence. When slendy looked back at us, he was covered in blood and still holding the proxy's headless body. He then vanished and so did It.

So that's great. He does eat humans. I can only hope this is like...an indulgence he only does once in awhile because he's afraid he'll get fat or something. I'm sure he only does it in times when he's extremely weakened.

I'm still working up to telling Chas about being a proxy, by the way. Hell, I don't even know if he's done with his whole "slendy isn't real I'm just crazy" thing. We'll see, I guess.

Home at last

It's wonderful to be out of that place. The Path of Black Leaves definitely isn't meant for humans. Even me, a proxy, could hardly stand it.

Ai, please don't think of it as a betrayal. I'm happy to be your proxy, it's what we'd been thinking about all along, isn't it? Slendy couldn't take me because I wouldn't let him in. You, on the other hand, I trust and I wouldn't close my mind off to you involuntarily like I do to slendderp. So, it's okay. Don't let it freak you out. I'm fine with it and with you I know I won't become some mindless Hallowed.

Chastin came back this morning, too. He got here just in time to see me just kind of appear in front of him holding on to Ai. The look on his face was priceless. I guess you can really only tell that a portal to the Path of Black Leaves has been opened when you're around trees and can see their leaves turn black...

Anyway, first I slapped him, then I gave him a monster hug and kiss (maybe that's a little cliche...). He apologized to me and told me that he needed a little more time away. I told him it was fine. Slendy was right the last time I talked with him, Chas needs time to understand all of this.

So yeah, it's nice not being surrounded by horrible monsters for a change. I guess we know now why slendy wanted to bring me into the Path of Black Leaves. He wanted to see whether or not I was already a proxy. Lovely...well, I'm fairly happy with how things turned out.

Thanks, Ai. I owe you cookies.

I saw that

I saw that last post on White Elephants. I can't believe Robert's gone...first Reach, then Zero, and now this. It doesn't seem real.

I'm sitting outside the gate to the castle now. I guess it caught up to me finally. I was walking down a path and suddenly the castle was three feet in front of me. I turned around and it was there, too. There isn't anywhere else for me to go...but the air inside the castle feels so wrong. It's painful even to be next to it.

I don't want to believe that I'm a proxy. I know it's silly...but I want to keep believing that there's another reason I can survive here. Slendy keeps telling me that he can't get inside my head. So...maybe, just maybe, this place can't get to me because he can't. I dunno...it's better than being a proxy that's for sure.

After all, if I'm not slendy's and I'm not Ai's...then I must be Its.

I hope that isn't the truth...

I don't know what to do.

But I guess face reality...

Lost in Darkness.

This place saps me of my will. It makes me want to just run out into the midst of those creatures and let them kill me. Except, I already tried that and they ran away from me. I'm so confused...according to both Robert and Scribe Sigma those critters should attack anyone who doesn't bear slendy's "mark" on sight. 

This place is always changing. The sky will be darker than black one minute and burning like fire the next. The trees are the only constant. They're twisted and deformed, like faces contorted in pain. The leaves turn to dust when I touch them. The buildings here are all scorched and ruined, except for the castle. The castle spears the sky and is...following me. It's coming closer with every step I take in any direction. 

I don't know why I'm still alive. Humans can only be here for minutes before it either saps their strength or the creatures kill them. I've been here for a day now and I'm feeling fine. Slendy definitely isn't here. My senses seem...increased here. I can feel every creature around me and I can feel worse things off in the distance that I hope don't get closer. I can even feel It watching me from the castle. Slendy, however, is not here.

How then am I still alive? It wouldn't protect me from this place and slendy isn't here to do it. 

So then...could I be a Sleeper? For those who don't know what that means, a Sleeper is a proxy that is completely normal before and after the time periods where slendy takes control. The Sleeper has no idea they're a proxy and is just like any other Runner on the surface. 

Slendy could have gotten to me during those tortuous weeks in the apartment after Chas left and I had no idea...

But, it could also be that I'm Ai's Sleeper. That's much much better than the alternative, obviously, but if that is the case I wish he'd have just told me. 

I don't know what to think...it could even be that neither of those possibilities are correct and that I'm alive because of something else entirely. The only other answer I can think of is that I'm just...special...which, of course, makes no sense.

I'm losing my mind...help me, Aiden

Ok, Blogger isn't letting me post anything or comment on other people's blogs so I hope you guys can at least see this and know that I'm not dead yet.

I was afraid of this. Also, you should look at the comments section because blogger isn't letting me post so everything I was going to say is down there.

Unfortunate Circumstances

Hi guys. It's been fairly quiet the past few days. As Ai said, I've been hanging out with Taben. I want to be there for him now that all this tragedy has occurred and it's been fun going out and stuff.

I'm not really sure what to do, to be honest. Chastin is gone and, frankly, I'm feeling kind of lost. I went out looking for him around town but I didn't find anything. I'm slightly concerned that It is going to do something to him. I say only slightly because I'm pretty sure slendy won't let that happen with the way things are now. I know slendy won't hurt either of us, at least. Its kind of weird to think that Taben is his now...Taben doesn't seem any different. He isn't anything like the crazed, murderous creatures most people become when they're made into slenderproxies. As a friend, I just don't want him to become like Steward or any of those crazy bastards...

I noticed that, every time slendy is around, he stares at me pointedly. Like, he makes it extremely obvious that he's looking at me. It makes me want to run up to him and kick him in the shins. I think he still plans on taking me into the Path of Black Leaves. I don't know why, but I'm sure that's what he's going to do soon.

I woke up last night because I heard my door creak and, sure enough, slendy is in the process of coming inside my room. Do you guys remember that one Marble Hornets episode where slendy does that to Alex? He like slowly opens the door to his room and just walks right in, if I remember correctly. Well, slendy was entering my room in the exact same fashion as he does in that episode of Marble Hornets. I think he knows that that episode frightened me the most out of all of them.

Yeah, I had a bitch fit at him. When I first saw the door open and his nonexistent  face appear I jumped and freaked out. I'm pretty sure he was laughing internally. He came in and just stood there, "staring" at me. I stared back for awhile, thinking he was going to talk to me, but he never did. Eventually, I got tired of it and turned over in bed so I couldn't see him. I woke up about three hours later to his pale visage not 2 feet away from my face. He was actually crouching down in front of me, waiting for me to wake up so he could scare me. I screamed and he thought it was hilarious. I felt that much from him...

Yeah, it was awkward when Aiden, Taben, and Brennon all rushed into my room at the same time and I was on the floor having a heart attack on the other side of the bed furthest from where slendy was kneeling. I hit my head pretty hard on the wall in my desperation to get away from him and I even managed to break the lamp on the bedside table and cut my arm up.

I am displeased and I'm going to shoot him with this bb gun the next time I see him.

I've never seen anything like that before in my life...

God damn...that was the most frightening and traumatic thing I've ever had to see in my life. It was...a bloodbath to say the least. I've never come face to face with proxies like the ones that attacked us before. They were like wild animals...and that girl, the Morrigan...the only word that comes to mind to describe them is horrifying. It's amazing that they've had themselves stripped entirely of their humanity...it's frightening to think that any of us could become that in an instant.

I feel awful for what happened to Taben because of us. I'm so sorry, Taben...you shouldn't have had to go that far just for us. I can't help but feel like your sacrifice will be in vain. I'm sorry for saying that, but I just don't trust slendy. If It can break its truce and murder dozens of people like that then slendy can break his truce with you to come back for us. I hope it won't come to that...but I can't help but fear. I don't care how benevolent he is to Allen, he isn't to be trusted. I said it myself earlier, he does what he does because that's how we made him to be. We made him into a murdering monster and that's all he'll ever be. He won't stop, not even for some truce. It also said it would keep its word and look what happened...

I dunno...I just want to forget about this.

Chastin is gone by the way. I think he slipped out during the confusion...and I know he isn't coming back. I'm fairly certain he's still alive, though. He wasn't among the bodies that were left behind in Its wake and the cops searched the surrounding woods and didn't find anything else. I can only hope he escaped It and slendy's notice during the fight and is safe. I can be assured that slendy won't hurt him for now at least.

Taben, I love you, dude. You're awesome and I promise I'll make your sacrifice worthwhile for as long as slendy is willing to keep his word.

I'm feeling conflicted

I asked slendy about becoming a Revenant last night. I'm going to go ask Aiden about it now. I wanted to hear both sides of it. I figured slendy would have at least informed Ai on the making of proxies so I'm thinking Ai will be able to tell me if slendy lied at all about the information he gave me.

Slendy told me the other day that he's always watching me. Well, he wasn't lying. I was in bed with Chas just thinking and suddenly I see a shadowy shape out of the corner of my eye. I sit up in a panic and there's slendderp, looking down at me. I was surprisingly relieved when I saw it was slendy. I had actually been afraid that it was It...that It had broken its truce once again and actually come inside to off us. Its kind of amazing how easy it is to tell the difference between Slender Man and It.

Anyway, we had a lovely conversation. Here it is:

Me: What are you doing here?

Slendy: I noticed you had a question for me.

Me: Oh, well, I wanted to ask if the Revenants exist.

Slendy: Why?

Me: If they do exist, then I'll let you turn me into one of them.

Slendy tilts his head and emits a threatening aura.

Slendy: You will let me? Impetuous child, I could have you wrapped around my finger in a second.

Me: Then why haven't you?

Slendy doesn't answer.

Me: You think I'm stupid? I know that I have to let you. I can feel it. You can't worm your way inside my mind like you can with the others. You need me to allow you inside. I noticed it when I was living in our apartment. You were looking for a way inside but you could never find it no matter what you did. Hell, I have to agree before you can even get in my mind to talk to me.

Slendy: Very well, I will admit that you are correct. It changes nothing, however. I know that you are desperate to protect your mate and the others living here. You will let me in eventually. That is why you have called me here.

Me: Will you answer my previous question?

Slendy: How do you know I won't lie?

Me: You told me once that you can't lie. You told Sandra that, too.

Slendy: You know too much for your own good, child.

Me: Look, just answer my question. I don't want to question what Reach established regarding the Revenants. I just...I feel like its our only chance. I need to know from you if they exist.

Slendy: Was the one you call Reach not a servant of mine?

Me: He was, but he said in the beginning that he was special. That he had superhuman strength, speed, and healing powers. A few months later he came out and said that you made him say that the Revenants are special to mess with people and that it was all a lie.

Slendy: Ah, yes. I remember that one. He was like you, strong of mind. In the end I was able to break him, however.

Me: Look, I don't want to get into that. I know what you did to Reach and a lot of us hate you for it. I just need you to answer my question.

Slendy: I can endow my servants with the power of the Other Side if I wish, this is true. The title "Revenant" is something fabricated by Reach on my orders, but this does not mean that servants with powers similar to those he described do not exist. There is no elite group of proxies as Reach led you to believe. Any of my servants can become a conduit for my power at any time.

Me: I will allow you to take me if you swear to me right now that you will not turn me into a Hallowed. I'm not going to be some mindless beast.

Slendy: You are not in a position to make demands of me, child.

Me: Would you really waste me by turning me into some expendable pawn? You know how strong my mind is. I would think you'd want to utilize it, not throw it away by turning me into a Hallowed.

Slendy: Again, you know too much for your own good. Very well, I give you my word that you will not be one of my lesser servants. I will ensure that you are at the proper level to become a conduit for my power and that you will remain sane.

Me: One more thing, I need you to promise me that you'll leave Chastin alone once you have me. I offer you my life in place of his.

Slendy pauses to think.

Slendy: I must take time to consider this. The next time I come back to you I will give you my decision.

He vanishes.

Well, that was fun. I'm gonna run the things he told me by Ai now.

P.S. Sorry if this bothers you guys...I just want to be able to protect my friends and my lover.

P.S.S. Ygg is back, I'm rather surprised.

It's coming

You're right, Aiden. I feel it, too. There's something ominous in the air here. I wish I could do something to help...I want to kill It as much as Aiden does. I wish I could comfort Taben somehow...he's been a good friend to me.

Aiden and Brennon have spent these last couple days trying to figure out how to deal with our recent tragedy. Taben still hasn't come out of his room and I'm not sure if they've told Allen yet. The young don't usually understand death enough to allow it to grieve them, but Allen's a pretty smart kid. I'm thinking that, somehow, he'll understand, and that isn't necessarily a good thing.

It seems...pleased with itself...god damn I want to murder that thing. Its very presence here right now is an insult. It's gloating. If that thing could smile, it would be grinning from ear to ear in some sick satisfaction at the sorrow and terror it's brought down on the people here.

Slendy's been...strangely morose. Its strange...but I think he feels bad for not being able to save Ry. I don't think he actually cares one way or the other about humans dying, but he cares about the feelings of certain people in this house at least.

I want to help take revenge on It. No...its not really revenge, though, is it? Getting rid of that monster would be some sort of salvation for certain people. If we could stop It, we would save everyone from a ton of heartache. One tall, skinny, murderous monster on our planet is enough.

I had a thought...right now I'm really of no help to anyone. Aiden is probably the best guy for the job of helping slendy kill It right now. Taben is Aiden's proxy but I'm pretty sure he just counts as an Agent. I don't think Agents have special powers, do they?

So, what about the Revenants? Well, apparently they don't actually exist. Lovely. I don't know what any of us can do, then. I had a plan...I was going to ask slendy to turn me into a Revenant. He's going to turn me into his servant eventually anyway...and if it means I can help then I want it. I'm not actually sure what to believe. Reach said they don't exist but Steward's writings suggest otherwise. I'm going to ask slendy about it. I'm sorry if this upsets anyone...but I need to help. I want to be able to do something. If I don't...if we don't stop It...then there's no telling which one of us could go next.

Also...I thought that maybe if I let slendy have me, he'd leave Chastin alone for good. I promise I'll only let slendy turn me if the Revenants really do exist. I know slendy can't lie.

I am willing.