Thursday, June 2, 2011

Eyes Open

I'm tired, I'm tired, I'm so fucking tired.
I haven't been sleeping, but I'm losing memory from minuets to days. I have no idea what's going on. I don't know where I am usually...
I'm usually in a mess, cuts, bruises, I look awful.

My loft is decorated in bullet holes from god knows what. I just remember finding the gun broken on the floor.
I've been pulling my hair, banging my head against walls trying to regain my memory. But all of it is fuzzy.
I'm going mad.
I tried talking to my Doctor, well let's say he tried to sign me up for the insane asylum.
I'm not going there, not ever. I'm not going crazy, just mad. I still have some control. Just not of everything
I hate it
I'm so fucking tired!
I can't get my eyes to stay closed it's like I have to be alert and I don't know why.
I refuse to believe all this shinanigans is Slendy's fault.
HE IS NOT REAL. He's just a figment of my imagination to cope with reasonings why I can't figure out things in my past, a childish reason to explain my actions lately.

I threw out the gun, it's gone. I burned Kyle's books and stupid shit. I didn't need it. I don't need to know why he went crazy.

And one thing I know for certain. I did not kill Kyle. He was my brother...

Why would I ever kill someone I love...


  1. Chastin please...its time to come home. I can help you. We can deal with this together. How can you call slendy a figment of your imagination when I've seen him too? I've spoken to him, Chastin. I know what he wants and I think that if we stay together we can outlast him. I'm begging you...

  2. I'm not coming back. I don't want to, I don't want to be around you like this.
    What if it kills you in the proses of getting to me. I'm not doing that.
    He's not real. It's me.
    I don't know what you're seeing, but it's not the same thing.

    Quit being so damn whiny. Man up for fucks sake.

  3. Its not whining. Its worrying about you because I love you. I know perfectly well what's happening and I'm just as worried as you are that some shit's gonna go down if you come back. You saw what he told me. He's watching me type this right now. He's always watching. I'm going through just as much hell as you are and I know that the only way we can cope is if we protect each other.

    I don't know what else to do, Chas...if you come back he'll take me. If you don't come back I'll end up giving in. He's going to use me to get you. Its always been about you. I don't want to hurt you...

  4. Chas. I think I can find you and Malkin. No worries there. I don't give a damned what you say. We're gonna come save you guys and bring you back here so you can cool off and regroup.

    Don't try and argue either. I'll knock you the fuck out to take you with me if I have to. I'm gonna talk to Aden in depth with it on the way to classes today and we'll get something figured out. It'd be so much easier if we had Todd here though. We're getting worried from not hearing anything from Bran.

  5. Taben, you are awesome. Please knock some sense into that kid for me. I can hold out here until Chastin is safe. Slendderp can be creepy in my apartment all he wants but I'm not giving in.